by Vera Devera
What comes to mind when you think of women and money?
Shoes.
Prince Charming.
I can save later.
I don't have enough.
That last one is sticky. How many times have we heard it, from ourselves or from our friends and family? The reality is, we all do have enough and are in position to be prosperous if we think about money differently.
That's what was so empowering about the YWCA of Oakland/Berkeley's Young Women and Money Conference that I attended with YWSE on December 5. We heard from three distinguished and inspiring keynote speakers throughout the day: Veronica Dangerfield (Inspirational Speaker and Marketing Manager at Patelco Credit Union), Valerie Coleman-Morris (former Business Anchor at CNN) and Kathleen Ronald ("Queen of Business Networking" and founder of Speakacular). The overall theme woven through each of their "pep talks" was that we all have the power within ourselves to take control of our money and that saving money is easier than you think -- as long as we put our minds over matter.
For some of us, dealing with money is like dieting. You slip up once and say to yourself, "Well, I screwed up so I guess indulging again today isn't going to make a difference -- I've already lost the battle." To make yourself feel better, you treat yourself to a new purse, a $30 meal, or a pair of jeans "on sale" and charge it to your card. Emotional spending, like emotional eating, is dangerous! Before making any impulsive purchases, ask yourself, do you really need it, or do you want it? Why do I want or need this?
By being honest with yourself, you will be taking the first step towards sound financial health. Even more importantly, if you do make a mistake, don't beat yourself over it. Forgive yourself for missing a credit card payment or opening another store credit card. Many women beat themselves over failure and fall into a vicious cycle of letting the failures pile up instead of looking at mistakes as guidelines to success. It's never too late or too early to start a healthy financial life, so don't sweat the small stuff. Just learn from your mistakes and move on.
Another recurring theme was self-reliance: "Pay yourself first." For every paycheck that you earn, be sure to put a percentage of it directly into a savings account that you cannot easily withdraw from. That way, you can start building your savings without really ever knowing you "had" that money. Or you can start as simply as saving all your loose change or a $1 a day. When you pay yourself first, you are investing in your future financial success.
Valerie Coleman-Morris shared these guidelines, which she called "Muddisms," or pearls of wisdom from the mothers in her life:
- Be deliberate
- Set small goals
- Achieve a them and set bigger ones
- Learn to function in chaos and you will finish in style
Valerie's tips coupled with Kathleen Ronald's advice to dare to dream, build a team (such as recruiting the support of friends and a certified financial planner) and have faith, were very inspiring. It all went back to what Veronica Dangerfield called "ashay," an African term that means we've all got the power within to make our dreams come true. Veronica made us repeat many times,"Today, I've got ashay and I am my own PG & E." Although we can certainly seek support and resources to achieve what we want, that desire is powered by you! If you want to own your own home, build your business, or have a great nest egg when you retire, it's all possible as long as you realize you are your own "PG & E" and that money doesn't give you power, rather you give it power to achieve your dreams.
If you missed this conference, don't fret. Go out and get a certified financial planner, open a savings account (separate from your checking), start saving, be conscious of your spending habits, and dare to dream and reach for them. With faith in yourself, you'll begin to live a prosperous life.
Here are some additional resources:The Thin Pink Line
Practical Money Skills
Jean Chatky's: The Difference
About Vera Devera: Vera Devera is a do-gooder by day (Account Executive at Donordigital, an online fundraising and advocacy nonprofit consultancy) and also moonlights as a special event planner (Va de Vie Events). She is a featured Weddzilla.com bride blogger and FoodBuzz featured publisher, and also blogs about her $10,000 wedding at "A Splendid DIY $10,000 Wedding."
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